


Grade A

by jercydee



Series: Haikyuu!! NaNoWriMo 2018 [22]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, Banter, F/F, Femslash, Flirting, Gen, Genderbending, NaNoWriMo, Rule 63, Snark, Third Gym (Haikyuu!!)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-24
Updated: 2018-11-24
Packaged: 2019-08-28 10:58:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,288
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16722054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jercydee/pseuds/jercydee
Summary: NaNoWriMo Day 22: Genderbend / Rule 63 AUDay Five of AU Week!Posting a new AU fic every day for one week.Gym 3 has Opinions™ about Tetsumi's new haircut.Gen tag is for platonic Gym 3, though Kuroo is high-key gay for Tsukki lol. She's also a little vulgar, but mostly a useless lesbian.





	Grade A

**Author's Note:**

> Enormous inspiration from the following:
> 
>   * [one](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/7d/6f/f1/7d6ff13a82b2cfd9189c78bb1757498c.jpg) (by [Viria](http://viria.tumblr.com), source post was deleted)
>   * [two](https://images-wixmp-ed30a86b8c4ca887773594c2.wixmp.com/intermediary/f/50fda466-fa3f-4a3b-9e3a-2c3165f6d81e/dagoyzn-00175bbc-d597-4060-90f2-3df475834ce8.jpg/v1/fill/w_1024,h_574,q_70,strp/haikyuu___bokuto_and_kuroo_genderbend_by_saturnspaz_dagoyzn-fullview.jpg) (by [Saturnspaz](https://www.deviantart.com/saturnspaz/art/Haikyuu-Bokuto-and-Kuroo-genderbend-632700707))
>   * [three](https://66.media.tumblr.com/07aa80ae4b728a6db2c67c9477ed9cf9/tumblr_nd4tgatx9P1r1i55go4_640.png) (by [Shoucolate](http://shoucolate.tumblr.com/post/99489346279/i-didnt-expected-that-my-volleygirls-sketch-would))
> 

> 
> Idk I just wanted to write about girls being Ultra Gay, my dudes.
> 
> As always, thank you to [Bear](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bearixt) for the beta and hilarious commentary!! ♥♥♥

Tetsumi gets a haircut a few days before the summer training camp. After dealing with long hair for a few months, she figures that having shorter hair will be much less of a hassle, especially with the upcoming increase in volleyball practice.

The fact that Karasuno is driving down to join them for camp again may or may not have a deciding factor in the particular style she chooses. She wonders how Tsukishima would like her new look.

* * *

Her team doesn’t make a big fuss out of it.

Aside from Ken-chan, the first- and second-years _ooh_  and _ahh_  when they first see her but otherwise get over it really quick. Ken-chan’s known Tetsumi since they were kids, so she definitely doesn’t care about Tetsumi’s style changes.

Yaku can not care less too, but she doesn’t really care for Tetsumi to begin with, more concerned about maintaining the pain-in-the-ass aspect of their frenemy relationship than she does about Tetsumi’s hair. Kai compliments her because she’s the kindest person on the team by far.

Tetsumi considers taking a photo and sharing it online—at the very least, text Bokuto about it—but decides not to, thinking that her teammates’ lack of reaction would be the same for everyone else. When the training camp starts, she finds out how wrong she is.

* * *

After the first day of camp, Tetsumi hears them talking. She’s just about to enter the gym for free practice but stops when she hears Bokuto, Akaashi, and Tsukishima clearly gossiping. She hides behind the wall, peering inside to spy on them.

“I could bring it up,” Bokuto stage whispers. Tetsumi rolls her eyes—the fact that she can hear Bokuto from halfway across the gym is not a surprise. That girl couldn’t keep quiet if her life was on the line.

“Bokuto-san, it’s not our place. It was Kuroo-san’s decision and she never asked us about it,” Akaashi says in a hushed voice. Tsukishima hums her agreement.

Tetsumi furrows her brows. They’re talking about _her?_

“But I feel like someone should say _something,_ ” Bokuto insists. Say something about what?

“I mean, I would,” Tsukishima says.

“Tsukishima,” Akaashi warns.

“I won’t unless she asks me, obviously.”

“But if she doesn’t then we don’t say anything.”

Bokuto doesn’t step down though, her volume increasing when she says, “But someone has to tell her!”

 _Tell me what?!_  Tetsumi thinks in frustration. _Stop beating around the bush!_

When Bokuto starts to whine even louder, Akaashi tries to calm her down and Tsukishima helps her out.

“Bokuto-san, not so loud–”

“What if Kuroo-san–”

“Kuroo should know though!”

Tetsumi’s had enough.

“I should know what?” Tetsumi asks, voice dripping with innocence as she grins at everyone. She projects loud enough so her friends can hear her, and everyone stops talking as she walks up to them.

“Kuroo-san,” Tsukishima says. She has a blush high on her cheeks, eyes wide like a deer caught in headlights.

Akaashi wears a similar expression when she asks, “How long have you been listening to us?”

“Long enough.” She shrugs.

“We didn’t realize you were there.” Akaashi gives her an apologetic look.

Tetsumi doesn’t answer her. “What did you want to tell me, Bokuto?” she asks instead, flashing the spiker a sweet smile.

Bokuto at least has the decency to look embarrassed. Tetsumi would find it really adorable if it weren’t for the fact she has to interrogate her over whatever gossip they were talking about.

“Oh, uh–”

“What?” she says. “You can’t tell me now that I’m here?”

“No! It’s just–”

“You look like a Grade A Lesbian with your new hair, Kuroo-san.”

Tetsumi takes a small step back, shocked by how bluntly Tsukishima puts it. She still has a blush tinting her face but she looks at Tetsumi straight-on, which Tetsumi would find it hot if she wasn’t so stunned right now.

“Tsukishima...” Akaashi says in a low voice, looking at her with narrowed eyes.

“Like, you actually have the lesbian side-mullet,” the blonde continues, adjusting her glasses. “It’s not bad, but you’ve never looked gayer in your entire life.”

Tetsumi melts at that. She places a hand on her chest, smiling softly at her precious middle blocker kouhai.

“Aw, Tsukki, that’s so sweet of you!” she coos, and Tsukishima rolls her eyes. Then she realizes something. “Wait, is that what you guys were worried about? My hair?”

Bokuto scratches her head. “You just got it cut,” she says. “We didn’t know if it was okay if we said anything.”

“Of course it’s fine,” Tetsumi replies. “Why wouldn’t it be?” Maybe she should have posted a picture after all...

“You get mad when someone talks about your bed head though!”

“Okay, yes, but it’s not the same. Kinda.” She rolls her eyes. “In any case, I’d want you to tell me if my new hairdo looks like shit.”

Then, Tetsumi gasps, eyes growing wide. “Oh god,” she realizes, “it _does,_  doesn’t it?”

Everyone begins to talk over each other.

“Of course it doesn’t–”

“No!Your new hair is cool!”

“I literally just said it wasn’t bad.”

Tetsumi sighs in relief. “If you’re sure...”

“So, you’re not mad?” Akaashi clarifies.

She shrugs. “Why would I be mad? I purposefully got this haircut so every girl who looks at me knows I eat puss–”

Tsukishima slaps a hand over her mouth.

“Kuroo-san, maybe _don’t_  announce that when half of Tokyo’s girls’ volleyball teams are in the vicinity,” she advises.

“But that’s the perfect time to say it!” Tetsumi whines behind Tsukishima’s hand.

The blonde rolls her eyes, and Akaashi facepalms.

“She’s not wrong,” Bokuto points out, tapping a finger on her chin.

Tetsumi gives the others a look. _See!_  she thinks as she waves an arm towards Bokuto.

“Can we just get on with practice now?” Akaashi asks, sounding exasperated. Tetsumi thinks she needs to pamper her one day, maybe invite the setter to the beach when this training camp ends so she can relax a little bit. Akaashi would look cute in a bathing suit.

Tetsumi mentally files the plan away for later, pulling Tsukishima’s hand from her face. “Yes,” she agrees. “As much as I’d love to talk about how gay I am, we should get to practice.”

Bokuto whoops, skipping away to grab a volleyball while Akaashi trails behind her. Tsukishima follows them, but Tetsumi stays back, allowing herself to check out Tsukishima’s long legs in her tiny volleyball shorts. Her butt is as cute as ever.

“I know you’re looking at me, Kuroo-san,” Tsukishima calls without looking back. “Please stop staring at my ass and help us out.”

Tetsumi blushes at getting caught, but catches up with the rest of her friends.

* * *

“So,” Tetsumi says during a water break, “is lesbian side-mullet doing anything for you?”

Tsukishima shoots her a side-eye glance while sipping from her bottle. She doesn’t answer after she finishes her drink, walking away to help Akaashi with something.

“I guess that’s a no,” Bokuto says when the other middle blocker leaves.

Tetsumi smiles, crossing her arms. “No, it’s not.”

* * *

**kuroocat**  • 1 hour ago

Summer Camp Day One:  
Was called a “Grade A Lesbian” today and Ive never been happier #gym3 #volleybabes #newhair

(Image: Kuroo, Bokuto, Akaashi, and Tsukishima huddled close for a selfie. Kuroo smirks at the camera, Bokuto makes a kissy face, Akaashi holds up a peace sign, and Tsukishima looks vaguely annoyed for being pulled into frame.)

**69 likes**

**kozumegg**      have i never called u that before?

 **kuroocat**      @kozumegg no!!

 **kozumegg**      @kuroocat oh. mb.

 **owlace4**      our favorit lesbian cat<3

 **tsukkikeis**      I’m flattered for being quoted on your Insta-caption

 **kuroocat**      @owlace4 my fave bi owl<3

 **kuroocat**      @tsukkikeis its the best compliment Ive ever received, thank u babe (-3-)♥♥

**Author's Note:**

> Listen I know this one isn't Karsuno-centric but Tsukki's in it so close enough /)>_>
> 
> Thank you for reading! Kudos give me life and comments will be handed a cookie<3
> 
> [NaNoWriMo profile](https://nanowrimo.org/participants/jercydee)  
> NaNo Tumblr (TBA) / Rebloggable version of this fic (TBA)  
> [Main Blog](http://striveattemptfail.tumblr.com)


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